What finally lit the fire to make me finish this two part post? This was in my FB feed today:
To which I say: WHY CAN'T IT BE BOTH?! In my previous post, I highlighted women voices throughout our history and noted (applauded) the current trend to teach girls how to set and achieve expectations that break through the barriers created by double standards based on gender.
However, I am frustrated that the pendulum is swinging so far that it is starting to discourage girls from being what would be labeled "girly." It never has to be a choice.
Two articles beautifully articulate my point. In "Engineer or Princess? Why your kids shouldn't be forced to choose," Chipps states:
"By saying 'forgo girly things for things that will get you interested in engineering' we’re saying 'if you want to be girly, you cannot also be a technology creator, an inventor, and a world changer'. We’re teaching girls to change who they are in order to effect change as an adult.
That is just as dangerous as telling girls they can only be girly. We are still forcing them into a box of what we believe they should be.
For Deibert, she doesn't want her daughter to hate pink. She notes that "Society teaches us boy stuff is awesome and girl stuff sucks, even for girls." How is that okay? Deibert realizes it isn't okay to continue to define things this way. I completely agree with her observation that, "To be human is to have a mix of traits and the faster we acknowledge that we aren’t cardboard cutouts predetermined by the way we urinate, the better off society will be." It is a crude way to put it but an effective one.
I think of the toys I had like Barbies and My Little Ponies-"girl toys". Then I smile as I remember how I used these toys alongside my Heman and Battlecat, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and a plethora of toys that didn't have to be separated by gender. Toys were just toys.
As an adult, I LOVE pink, glitter, and frills. I wear a birthday tiara on my, well, birthday. There is a part of me (very deep down) who still yearns to be a princess. My excitement over the Beauty and the Beast live action film can barely be contained. Yet, I also am OBSESSED with Wonder Woman (all superheroes/comics really), hockey, Star Wars, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (some loves never die), and other things that can easily be associated as "boy things." ALL of this defines the person I am.
Bottom line: it should be up to the girl what she wants to be and do. If she wants to be an engineer, she should be able to do that. If she wants to be a homemaker, she should be able to do that. If she wants to climb the corporate ladder knocking narrow minds for a loop, she should be allowed to do that and be paid equally.
The point is NO ONE should force her to believe she is capable of only one thing because she is female. And if she wants to be the next Nobel Prize winner in Physics, she most certainly should be able to accept that prize in a pair of stellar high heels and a tiara!
